Trial and HAIRor

A normal good curl day.

A normal good curl day.

For those of you who have been following my blog since the beginning you know that this has been all about my #curlstory.  These #curlchronicles are a fun exploration of my journey with my curls.  Today is no different.  For my entire life my hair experiments have definitely been trial and error, especially in my pre-college days when I didn’t have as many resources.  Today there are so many voices out there that you could be trying different products and methods constantly if you aren’t careful.  Today I was reminded of these Trials and HAIRors when I woke up to an email from my Dad.  Sidenote:  I totally love my father.  He has been my number one supporter from day one.  From coach to cheerleader he has always had my back.  So I was not surprised that he would share an email that ties to my latest project – this blog.

The email was simply a forward from Flipboard (who knew my Dad used Flipboard) sent at 6:30 AM with a link to an article on entitled “8 Things You’re Doing Wrong to Your Curls”.

Huffington Post Article: 8 Things You're Doing Wrong to Your Curls Co-authored by Elena Nicolau, writing intern at Avelist. That my dad sent to me.

Huffington Post Article: 8 Things You’re Doing Wrong to Your Curls Co-authored by Elena Nicolau, writing intern at Avelist. That my dad sent to me.

So I scrolled through it quickly before jumping out of bed to start my day.  While all of them I had heard before some I have to say I disagreed with.  So I thought I would give you the cliff notes version of the article and enhance with my curl experience.

Elena Nicolau’s first tip was “Put that brush down!”  She goes on to suggest that brushing your hair will destroy your curls.  This is simply not true.  There are certain combs and brushes that will work well on your curls with the right amount of conditioner, moisture and/or styling product.  The key is begin styling your hair when it is dripping wet.  I start my style in the shower as I am washing and conditioning my hair.  I always comb conditioner through my hair in the shower and let it sit.  Combing my hair with a wide tooth comb separates my curls and allows them to spring into their natural spiral.  If I am not looking for a smooth, defined look I may skip the comb and only use my fingers.  I also tend to do this when I am in a rush or traveling.  Ultimately you will need to go through your styling process once using a comb and once using just your fingers to see which look you prefer.  You definitely do not want to attempt to comb or brush dry curls.  If you are doing a slick-back style like a bun, ponytail or faux hawk I recommend using a boar brush (like a men’s wave brush) to smooth out your curls.  Be gentle and careful not to scratch your scalp.  Avoid using any round brushes because your curls will wrap around the brush and make it difficult to style.

Tip 2 was “Throw out that crunchy, flaky gel!” Here Miss Nicolau and I agree.  Adding any styling product like gel or mousse that contains alcohol is never a good idea.  However there are some great gels out there for curls that don’t make your hair crunchy or flaky with proper application.  For example the Ouidad Climate Control Heat & Humidity Gel that I reviewed in my last blog post or AG Liquid Effects , an alcohol-free Extra Firm Styling Lotion, which is a great gel alternative.  Of course you can also turn to my favorite – the curl creams.  Ouidad and AGhair are again favorites of mine.

Don’t go to any old hairdresser,” was the third tip.  Again, I agree.  I shared in my last post that I have learned how amazing specialized curly hairstylists like Ouidad certified stylists are.  Do your research.  I move a lot so I am always looking for a new stylist.  I would love to always wait until my semi-annual trips home to see my lifetime stylist, Cynthia at Pampered People in Danville, PA but that is just not possible.  I usually will ask for recommendations when I see someone with hair similar to mine or I will google/yelp for naturally curly hair stylists.  I also go in for a consultation before ever allowing someone to cut or color my hair (those are permanent and serious changes to my appearance).  Feel free to ask them for photos of their clients hair – today many stylists have Instagram or other social media accounts to show photos of their skills.  I had some really bad experiences when I did take the time to research. I highly recommend you don’t rush into any salon and assume they can handle your hair even if they say they can.

Tips 4, 5 and 6 go hand in hand.  Limit your shampoo! Don’t skimp on the conditioner. Who needs a blow dryer, anyway? This is all about your maintenance routine and again the author is accurate.  If you have learned anything about your curly hair it should be not to shampoo your hair daily.  It strips your hair of all the natural oils that keep it healthy and shiny.  You should really wash your hair once a week with a sulfate-free shampoo that is less drying.  Focus on your scalp and any product buildup and let the shampoo rinse through your curls.  Unless you competed in a mud run or have an excessive amount of styling products in your hair you shouldn’t need to wash your hair more than that.  I usually choose to wet my hair almost everyday and add leave in conditioner.  This keeps your curls hydrated so you minimize frizz.

Air dried curls before bed

Air dried curls before bed

I also try to wash my hair in the early evening so it has time to air dry before bed or I will do it in the morning if I am in a warm climate so it has the day to air dry.  If you must dry your hair after adding styling product you should add a diffuser to the blowdryer and hold about 4-6 inches from your head being careful not disturb your curls and cause frizz.

Crazy beach day hair but I still love my curls!

Crazy beach day hair but I still love my curls!  Frizz does happen.

My best friend Selena loves the diffuser – I am always running late and rarely have the time.  It is really your preference.  If you plan to be outside especially if you are going to be in or near water you may want to leave a little of your conditioner in by only rinsing about 50% out.  That way as the water or sun hits your hair it is hitting the conditioner first and you won’t end the day with dry, frizzy curls.  Another tip I would like to add is that you should deep condition your curls weekly.  You can use an actually deep conditioner or a hot oil treatment if you like.  Depending on the climate where you live you may need more conditioning than others.  Living in Florida my nemesis is the humidity.  I have been applying a conditioner for color-treated hair (since I just decided to go light again – more on that later) along with organic coconut oil to my hair, putting on a plastic shower cap then wrapping with a scarf.  I apply this at night and when I wake up my hair is smooth, soft and shiny.  I can run my fingers right through it.  I rinse it out in the shower and follow up with my normal styling routine.  Try different types and find the one that gives you the results you need.

The seventh tip from the article was simply, “Don’t get discouraged!”  I like it.  It’s simple but true.  The author mentions the online community which has increased our ability to share all things curly.  This is exactly why I started blogging so I could be part of the awesome Curl Community.  Blogging pushes me to try new products and techniques.  I love sharing what works for me and what doesn’t but everyone needs to go out and explore on their own.  Don’t give up – you will find your perfect #curlcocktail.

Curls. curls. curls. I can always count on them.

Curls. curls. curls. I can always count on them.

The biggest issue, and one that we’ve all struggled with, comes when you’re not embracing your curls.  The final tip is to simply love your curls and again I could not agree more.  Curls are beautiful in all textures, patterns, colors and length.  I love seeing my fellow #girlswithcurls and guys too.  Compliment someone with curls today and help them feel confident about being a part of the wonderful world of curls!  Don’t forget this is a journey.  I would add my own additional tip to make it 9. Try different things with your hair. Different products. Different processes. The different styles.  Remember that you know your hair best. And it’s only through experimenting that you’ll know what your curls need.  Enjoy the path of your #curlstory and find what works for you with Trial and HAIRor.

Curls Out The Box!

Thanks to my girlfriend Jennifer (remember she is the one who helped get me started in this blog life) I got to do a Curl MAY-KOVER in June.  I have been waiting to receive a curlbox for years and finally, by way of NYC, one arrived on at my door.  I was like a kid at Christmas carefully tearing into the packaging, anticipating what wonderful gift was inside.

Love in box for my curls from my girl Jenn!

Love in box for my curls from my girl Jenn!


The official curlBOX!


Myleik Teele is the genius who launched curlBOX to allow women the chance to try several hair products for the price of one each month.  The popularity.  For as long as I can remember there has been a waitlist to get on the coveted curlbox list.  They say getting things in life is more about WHO you know than WHAT you know and this is certainly a case for that fact.  Needless to say I was immediately impressed by the packaging and the letter from Myleik introducing the MAY-KOVER products.  Of course I decided I needed to try them immediately.



After 2 days without washing and coming straight from the gym my hair looked like it does a lot of days in South Florida – dry and frizzy.

The products featured in the curlBOX were all from the Creme of Nature Argan Oil collection.  I jumped in the shower and since I didn’t have a lot of product in my hair I used the Pure-Licious Co-Wash Cleansing Conditioner – in the past I hadn’t been a fan of co-wash products if I had a lot of build-up from products on my scalp.  I followed up the co-wash with the Argan Buttermilk Leave-in Hair Milk – again even though I know I should be using leave-ins more often I never felt like they moisturized my hair enough.  Not the case here.  I probably would have been good to go just after those two products but since I had the Style & Shine Foaming Mousse I figured I may as well finish it off.  This was the result after using the 3 products.  You can see the moisture and definition in my curls even with them being piled up on top of my head.



While this alone is impressive the fact that 3 days later I have not had to re-wet my hair or add more product (which I usually do if I want to see decent hair).  #NoFrizz What I really loved was that I didn’t have to use a lot of any of the products which means they will actually last me a little while unlike most products – remember my “Sponge” post?

Check out 3 days of creme of nature curls (Yes, I do wear black almost everyday to work).  Needless to say I will definitely be using this product – I am a fan.  Thank you curlBOX from just a curly gurl!

Day 1 Curls - Hair down and lots of movement

Day 1 Curls – Hair down and lots of movement

Day 2 curls - pinned some up for style but still plenty of spring.

Day 2 curls – pinned some up for style but still plenty of spring.

Day 3 curls - after working out each day starting to dry a bit but still great curl definition pinned back

Day 3 curls – after working out each day starting to dry a bit but still great curl definition pinned back


I can’t lie sometimes I do get bored with curls – okay I am one of those people who gets bored with just about everything eventually.  In any event, when it comes to my hair some days I have more time on my hands or I see something I want to try and I am determined to do it.  Since I began blogging I have used my @justacurlygurl Instagram and Twitter accounts to follow inspiring #girlswithcurls all over the world.  I also have recently turned to YouTube for inspiration and tutorial….yes I know I am late to the game.

Faux Bangs

Experimenting with bobby pins to create faux bangs.

I have always been intrigued by people who have bangs.  I even once bought a wig so I could see what I looked like with bangs, but it was straight hair.  I was always worried if I cut my hair while it was straight that it would look crazy when it was curly.   At one point a couple years ago I let a stylist put long layers in my hair and it almost looked like bangs when I styled it right curly.

3 years ago in MN I had some serious layers which when curly gave the look of  bangs.

3 years ago in MN I had some serious layers which when curly gave the look of bangs.

More recently, I found an alternative way to try faux bangs with my good friends the bobby pins.  Thanks to a random search on YouTube I successfully created bangs on Easter morning when I was celebrating with my bestie and her family.  I think it made an interesting frame to my face.  What do you think?  I may try it again one day with a ponytail.  I think that would be interesting.  Having this blog is certainly getting me to pull the trigger on trying some new things and I must say I like it.  I know I have a tendency to get lazy with my hair especially 2-3 days after washing.  The messy bun (a topic for a future post) is a frequently used style during the week and in the gym.  I am seriously trying to step my hair game up.

It’s funny how being more adventurous with my hair is helping me do the same in life.  As a constant overthinker and analyzer I am often gun shy when it comes to new things.  I resolved to try more and say yes more often in 2015 and so far I am keeping that promise to self.  So bang bang – I will keep pulling that trigger.  I will NOT however be cutting my hair and making bangs permanent anytime soon.  I like it but I didn’t love it.  So I will keep trying new looks.  Let me know what you think!


I just had a childhood flashback while washing the dishes. Growing up my Dad was a Boy Scout leader of a local troop and all of my brothers participated in scouting.  As the only girl I often was forced to tag along on camping trips since my mom assisted with the troop.  I couldn’t have been more than 6 or 7 and I remember being on a scout trip and one of the boys said my hair looked like a Brillo pad. He along with other teased me the whole weekend and threatened to use my head to wash the dishes. 

It’s funny how things stick with you from childhood – especially any name you are called. However, children remember good things too.  Like I always knew that being adopted and looking different than everyone else meant I was special. How did I know that?  Because my mom and dad told me all the time. But being special didn’t seem fun if it meant someone was going to use my hair to wash dirty pots and pans.

A couple decades and a million ounces of conditioner later, I know full well my hair is NOTHING like a Brillo pad, however my hair is a total sponge.  I laugh anytime I read directions on hair products. “Use a dime size” “pour a capful” “add a bit” Ha!  I usually triple or quadruple the amount suggested and then add more later.  Of course the longer my hair the more product I use.  My hairdresser from home, Cynthia (you’ll hear her name a lot), was the first to call my hair a sponge.  Notice different than my childhood tormentors she called my hair and not me the sponge.  She said my hair soaked up everthing. Water – she had wring out my hair several time before styling.  Relaxers (yes had a few back in the day), heat (try sitting under a dryer for 2 hours and still having damp ends), color, shampoo, conditioner, mousse, gel, curl cream, oil, you name it my hair absorbed it like it was a plant in the desert.

Because of the amount of hair products I use I am always stocking up when my go-to stores (CVS, Sally’s or Ulta) have sales. I love that all of them allow me to return products if I find they don’t work for my hair or I just don’t like them. As long as they are 3/4 full any of those stores give me my money back.  I can’t afford to throw away money with the amount I buy.  Since I typically wash my hair twice a week I always buy 2 conditioners for 1 shampoo.  When I find a styling product that works like Tigi Curlsesque (formerly Curls Rock) curl cream in the turquoise and black pump bottle I buy a bunch. 

So if you take anything from this post know that compliments and positive reinforcement go a long way with anyone but especially children.  When you are growing up and you have any feature that’s different and/or draws attention other kids can be pretty cruel and we need the love and support of our family and friends.


head full of hair – total sponge

And if you or yours have a ton of hair like me don’t ever follow the label when it comes to directions or if you do…double, no triple it. 🙌

Taking the plunge

After decades of being asked about my hair I have finally decided to find a forum to share what I have experienced.  So no matter what your curl story is you will hopefully find a way to connect with my curl chronicles or in the least enjoy a good story or two.

First, let me introduce myself, my name is Courtney Marie.  I was adopted when I was only 7 weeks old by two amazing people and grew up with my brothers in a small town in central Pennsylvania.  When I was about 9 I found my birth certificate and discovered I was mixed (according to my paperwork I was “mulatto” – more about that in a future post).  I know very little about my birth parents beyond their age and race.  What I do know is that I grew up in a house and a community where the faces and hair did not match mine.

I cannot remember a time when I didn’t struggle in some way shape or form with my hair.  Only the innocent baby you see in this post lived a life free of hair problems.  I know if you asked my mother she would say she also bore the pain of the early years.  I can remember sitting between her legs while she brushed my hair out.  She didn’t have Google or YouTube to assist her in the challenges of raising a daughter whose hair was nothing like her own.  She also couldn’t ask a neighbor or find a hairdresser in town that had hair like mine.  We were on her own.  My mom’s solution?  Cut it short when it gets too long to deal with.  Short curly hair combined with my brothers’ hand-me-downs resulted in being mistaken for a little boy more often than not.

Thinking back I only recall wishing I had wavy red hair like my mom or straight dirty blond hair like my cousin.  In fact, I am pretty sure I spent about the first 20 years of my life wishing I had hair that wasn’t mine.  Little did I know that women out there do it all the time and it is just called weave (again a subject for a future post).  There are a number of reasons why I didn’t love my hair but they all come down to a common denominator – I didn’t have someone to help me or to identify with.  I don’t blame anyone – it was my reality at the time.  Luckily, any little girl in a situation similar to mine now has access to so many resources to help them learn to love their curls early.   Maybe I was nudged by Dove’s new #loveyourcurls campaign 

My family - circa 1982.  Can you spot me?

My family – circa 1982. Can you spot me?

Regardless, here I am taking the plunge and sharing my journey with my curls.  It is an ongoing roller coaster ride that I have learned to love.  I do love my curls and I am so glad God blessed me with them.  That does not mean I always know what to do with them or how to take care of them so you can join me as I continue to learn what works and what doesn’t.  Welcome to my #curlchronicles and thank you for reading my first post.  Please subscribe or come back for more.